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SATURDAY, JULY 18, 2009

The Mugwump and the Dog




My cat went astray along with my thoughts this week. Gone for 2 days. Came back skinny, wet and unable to tell me what had occured. I am currently acting in a reasonable manner, and have blamed my neighbour's dog. The war on a terrier has begun.


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FRIDAY, JULY 17, 2009

Fly Mungolian ... You BITCH!




Fly Mungolian ... You BITCH!There are numerous merits to flying Mungolian, I hear.

I am not convinced.

My late neighbour, Pierre, was a great believer in Mungolian flight, often taking several trips in a month. The dusty old queen had accumulated serious Air Miles.

Light years, in fact.

Fat lot of good it did him.

One well-placed stilletto later, and they're just sitting as part of the "unused" section in the Mungolian HQ database.

Poor bugger.

However, for all you ... ahem ... NORMAL folks out there in webland, I suggest that you choose a different airway to transport you to those hard-to-reach places. Or maybe a good toothbrush and some dental floss.

Unless, of course, you subscribe to the Church of Bling, and have gold teeth. If so, I'm pretty sure that Steely Dan lyrics would be wasted upon your nefarious and shallow head, and that clichés about Mexicans and other racial stereotypes are more your thing.

I will refrain from such ...
full


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THURSDAY, JULY 16, 2009

Dispensing with Comprehensibility: Official




Pierre looked better in high heels than most women, but only a woman would hold that against him. In particular, his mother. Last night they were heard arguing about it. His neighbours found him dead this morning with a stiletto through his left eye. It will be a beautiful funeral.


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