In attempting to view the British Channel 4 Alternative Election Night with the magnificent Charlie Brooker (couldn't find a live stream) I made a horrifying discovery:
MARGARET THATCHER IS STILL ALIVE
Could someone please fix this IMMEDIATELY?
That fucking cunt should have been dead years ago ...
Today you cast votes to decide something. What, exactly?
The Dhaqwaan of Po-Lonte once said:
"Democracy's been dead a long time ... voting is just a ritual to remind us of what it was like when it was alive"
Perhaps this is true ...
Just remember that the majority of these people will - no matter what the outcome - continue to reap financial rewards for doing next to nothing for you. Whether in power or in opposition, they will be smiling. And you will still be expected to bend over and take the full length and girth of the winning side's offerings.
May your gods have mercy on your souls.
Of course, the quality of your masturbatory practices should remain unaffected by the whole thing. You see: Every cloud has a silver lining.
